Aminet 21/Aminet 21 (1997)(GTI - Schatztruhe)[!][Oct 1997].iso/Aminet/comm/cnet/supertg4.lha/Red_Neck

Text File | 1997-06-23 | 37KB | 604 lines

@TO@ - redneck extrordinaire!
@TOFIRST@'s redneck extrordinaire!
A Southern Redneck's Seven Course Dinner: Possum and a six pack!
Are redheads rednecks too?
Are you a redneck #15: If you have an 8-track player in your 4x4.
Are you a redneck if your family tree has no branches?
BBS Lingo: URA; You Are A (e.g., Redneck)
BBS Lingo: YKYARW; You Know You're A Redneck When...
Beware! This is a known habitat of gun-toting rednecks!
Bigot? Racist? Fundamentalist? Redneck? The Republicans want YOU!
Bigot? Racist? Fundamentalist? Redneck? The repukelicans want YOU!
Do rednecks have a rash?
FIDO lie #XIX: I don't match any URA Redneck tagline descriptions.
Fundamentalist (n): brain dead backwoods redneck.
Git 'n the truck, bitch. Redneck foreplay.
God made gays so Rednecks wouldn't be bored by just picking on blacks.
Hello, is this Rednecks For Peace?
How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the chin.
How do you know a redneck? The child calls her father Uncle Daddy.
How to know you're a Redneck--Your cousin becomes your wife.
I heard that all the brides of Dracula were rednecks.
I'm a High-tech Redneck!
I'm not a REDNECK! I have a strong Southern personality!
If the primary color of your car is bondo, you might be a redneck!
If you find a car while cutting your grass, you might be a redneck.
If you go to family reunions to pick up girls... you might be a redneck!
If you got to family reunions to meet wimmin, you might be a redneck.
If you had to take the wheels off your new home, you might be a redneck.
If you mowed your lawn and found a car... you might be a redneck!
If you smoked during your wedding... you might be a redneck!
If you wore sequins to your wedding, you might be a redneck!
If you're family tree is a straight line, you're a Redneck.
If you've been accused of lying through your tooth, you're a Redneck.
If your dog and your wallet are both on a chain, you might be a redneck.
If your father is also your uncle, you might be a redneck.
If your mama keeps a spitcup on the ironing board, yer a REDNECK!!!!!!!!!
Kiss me, I'm a Redneck.
Q: What is Redneck foreplay? A: Get in the truck, bitch.
Redneck foreplay: (Nudge) Are you awake?
Redneck foreplay: Get in the truck, b*tch.
Redneck foreplay: Get in the truck, bitch.
Redneck love -- It's a Family affair.
Redneck marriage proposal.........yER WHUT!?
Redneck Marriage Proposal: You're WHAT!?!
Redneck Menu Conundrum #1: What wine goes with Moon Pies?
Redneck Menu Conundrums #1: What wine goes with Moon Pies?
Redneck Menu Conundrums #2: What wine goes with possum?
Redneck pick line: Hey, you look like my sister.
Redneck pickup line: Hey, you look like my sister.
Redneck--7 cars in the front yard--you ride your horse to work.
Redneck--Takes the wheels off of your neighbor's new house.
Redneck--your daughters' children also call you Cousin!
Redneck--your nephew's wife calls you Cousin too.
Redneck: (n); a person whose family tree doesn't fork.
Redneck: Not to be confused with the similar `cowboy'.
Redneck: Person whose family tree doesn't fork
Save Florida: Teach a Redneck how to drive!
Sign of a Redneck: Circular Family Tree.
Sign of a Redneck: Family tree doesn't branch
Stop crack! Make rednecks wear belts!
The U.F.O. hotline limits rednecks to one call per day.
To be a Redneck, you must have been a 'snipe' hunter more than once!
Ura Redneck Anyone in your family has ever worn a tube-top to a wedding.
Ura Redneck if a big time is shooting rats at the dump.
Ura Redneck if a six pack and a bug zapper is quality entertainment.
Ura Redneck if after making love you ask to roll down the car window.
Ura Redneck if after making love you ask your date to roll down the window.
URA Redneck if all of your four-letter words are two syllables
Ura Redneck if all your art was purchased at gas stations.
Ura Redneck if any of your hobbies require dogs and a lantern.
Ura Redneck if Anyone in your family has ever worn a tube-top to a wedding.
Ura Redneck if blowing a tire means a new flower pot of the front yard.
Ura Redneck if both yer dog and yer wallet are on a chain.
Ura Redneck if Chiggers are included on your list of top 5 hygiene concerns.
Ura Redneck if common household phrase is Somebody jiggle that.
Ura Redneck if directions include turn off the paved road.
Ura Redneck if directions to your house include Turn off the paved road.
Ura Redneck if everybody can tell what kind of underwear U're wearing.
Ura Redneck if everyone in your family is an Elvis impersonator.
Ura Redneck if family reunions are good places to pick up women.
URA Redneck if going to the bathroom at night involves shoes and a flashlight.
ura Redneck if hail hits your house...you take it to the body shop.
Ura Redneck if hitchhikers won't get in the car with you.
Ura Redneck if If your dog and your wallet are both on a chain.
Ura Redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of admired people.
URA Redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of most admired people.
Ura Redneck if Jack Daniels makes your most admired list.
Ura Redneck if kudzu is in your family crest.
Ura Redneck if Less than half of the cars you own run.
Ura Redneck if less than half the cars you own run.
Ura Redneck if license plate is personalized b/c your father made it.
Ura Redneck if mowing lawn, you find three cars.
Ura Redneck if on your honeymoon you leave the driving to Greyhound.
Ura Redneck if People are scared to touch your bathrobe.
Ura Redneck if People ask permission to hunt in your front yard.
Ura Redneck if people hunt in your front yard.
Ura Redneck if photos of your mama were taken from the front and side.
Ura Redneck if Potted meat on a saltine is an appetizer.
Ura Redneck if red man chewing tobacco sends you a Christmas card.
URA Redneck if Somebody jiggle that is a common household phrase.
URA Redneck if someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.
Ura Redneck if stealing road signs is a family outing.
Ura Redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Ura Redneck if taxidermist bill > annual income.
URA Redneck if taxidermist bill exceeds annual income.
Ura Redneck if Thanksgiving was ruined b/c you ran out of ketchup.
Ura Redneck if the cockroaches left a note saying 'Clean this place up!'
Ura Redneck if The directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
Ura Redneck if The family heirloom is great-grandpappy's wooden false teeth.
Ura Redneck if the main color of you're car is bondo.
Ura Redneck if The main color of your car is primer.
URA Redneck if the main course at potluck dinners is road kill.
Ura Redneck if The neighbors started a petition concerning your hog pen.
Ura Redneck if the original color of you carpet is an unsolved mystery.
Ura Redneck if The Orkin man tells you, 'Give up; you've lost.'
URA Redneck if the pink flamingos in your front yard aren't a joke
Ura Redneck if the primary color of your car is Bond-O.
Ura Redneck if The rear tires on your car are twice as wide as the front ones.
Ura Redneck if The Sheriff keeps a cell reserved for your family members.
Ura Redneck if The taillight covers on your car are made of tape.
Ura Redneck if The UFO Hotline limits you to one call per day.
Ura Redneck if there are antlers nailed to the outside of your house.
Ura Redneck if there are tobacco stains down the sides of your school bus.
Ura Redneck if There has ever been crime-scene tape on your bathroom door.
URA Redneck if there is a ham hanging from your front porch.
Ura Redneck if there is a puddle in your driveway year-round.
Ura Redneck if there is a stuffed possum anywhere in your home.
Ura Redneck if There is a stuffed possum mounted anywhere in your house.
Ura Redneck if There is a wasp nest in your living room.
Ura Redneck if there's a picture of Johnny Cash over the fireplace.
Ura Redneck if there's a wasp nest in your living room.
Ura Redneck if There's more than 5 McDonalds bags on your car's floor.
Ura Redneck if today's dinner was too slow crossing the highway yesterday.
Ura Redneck if truckers tell your wife to watch her language.
Ura Redneck if U consider beer and a bug-zapper quality entertainment.
Ura Redneck if U don't stop at rest stops b/c U have an empty milk jug.
Ura Redneck if visiting relatives means getting mud on your tires.
Ura Redneck if What the hell are you looking at, Shithead?
Ura Redneck if when you go to family reunions to meet women!
Ura Redneck if when your house warming involves removing the tires.
URA Redneck if while mowing lawn, you find three cars.
Ura Redneck if yer car window is a Hefty bag.
Ura Redneck if yer family tree does not fork.
Ura Redneck if yer idea of literature is the TV-Guide.
Ura Redneck if yew have a rag as a gas-cap.
URA Redneck if you actually know which leaves make the best toilet paper
Ura Redneck if You answer the door with a baseball bat in your hand.
Ura Redneck if you are allowed to bring your dog to work.
Ura Redneck if you are famous for your homemade squash wine.
Ura Redneck if you barbecue Spam on the grill.
Ura Redneck if You beat off to Field and Stream.
Ura Redneck if you bring a bar of soap to a public pool.
Ura Redneck if you brother-in-law is also your uncle.
Ura Redneck if You burn your front yard instead of mow it.
Ura Redneck if you buy a new house and have to take the wheels off.
Ura Redneck if you call the boss Dude.
Ura Redneck if you call your boss Dude.
Ura Redneck if You call your father 'Uncle Dad'.
URA Redneck if you can burp the entire chorus of 'Jingle Bells.'
Ura Redneck if you can drink rubbing alcohol.
ura Redneck if you can drink tobacco spit and not puke!
URA Redneck if you can drink tobacco spit.
Ura Redneck if you can eat a McDonald's cheeseburger in one bite.
Ura Redneck if you can guzzle Ever Clear!
Ura Redneck if You can have sex without spilling your beer.
URA Redneck if you have to mow your driveway.
Ura Redneck if you have `dress' boots.
Ura Redneck if you hold a frog and *it* worries about getting warts.
Ura Redneck if you just bought an 8-track tape player for your car.
Ura Redneck if you keep a pellet gun by the front door.
URA Redneck if you keep catfish in your aquarium.
Ura Redneck if you keep your thermostat on 85 in the winter.
Ura Redneck if you know hay many bales of hay your car can hold.
Ura Redneck if You list your parole officer as a reference.
Ura Redneck if You look for the Black Velvet Artists section in an art museum.
Ura Redneck if you love your pets more than your family.
URA Redneck if you made a homemade hot tub with a trolling motor
Ura Redneck if you mother has ever been arrested for poaching.
Ura Redneck if you owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.
Ura Redneck if you own 3 TV's and only 2 books.
Ura Redneck if you own a belt buckle that weighs more than 3 pounds.
Ura Redneck if you own a denim leisure suit.
Ura Redneck if You own a homemade fur coat.
Ura Redneck if you own a mobile home and more than 5 cars on blocks.
Ura Redneck if You OWN a Monster Truck.
Ura Redneck if you own more cowboy boots and sneakers.
Ura Redneck if you own more cowboy boots than sneakers.
Ura Redneck if you own more cowboy boots then sneakers.
Ura Redneck if you own more than 3 shirts with the sleeves cut off.
Ura Redneck if you own more than three shirts with cutoff sleeves.
Ura Redneck if You pick your teeth from a catalog.
Ura Redneck if You prefer car keys to Q-tips.
Ura Redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
Ura Redneck if you prominently display gifts you bought at Graceland.
Ura Redneck if you prominently display the gift you got at Graceland.
Ura Redneck if you quit your job so you won't have to pay child support.
Ura Redneck if you quit your job to avoid paying child support.
Ura Redneck if You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.
Ura Redneck if you record WWF Wrestling while Ura at work.
Ura Redneck if you record WWF Wrestling while you're at work.
Ura Redneck if you refer to the fifth grade as 'my senior year.'
Ura Redneck if you refer to your van as 'The Love Machine.'
Ura Redneck if you roll down the car window after sex.
Ura Redneck if you sell rabbits out of your car.
Ura Redneck if you serve Gallo and Colby at your cheese & wine parties.
Ura Redneck if you serve Gallo and Colby at your cheese and wine parties.
Ura Redneck if you shop for groceries at a gas station.
Ura Redneck if you show your belt buckle as an ID.
Ura Redneck if you show your belt buckle for an ID.
Ura Redneck if you show your belt buckle when asked for I.D.
Ura Redneck if You skipped school in the 8th grade to vote.
Ura Redneck If you start foreplay by saying. Get in the truck B#%&@.
ura Redneck if you start foreplay with Get in the truck B%$#@.
Ura Redneck if you still have an 8 track player in your car.
Ura Redneck if you still have an 8-track tape player in your car.
Ura Redneck if you take a bath once a week.
Ura Redneck if you take the entire day off work to get your teeth cleaned.
Ura Redneck if you think 'recycling' means going home from work.
Ura Redneck if you think a Volvo is part of a woman's body.
ura Redneck if you think BMW are the call letters for a radio station.
Ura Redneck if you think BMW is the call letters for a radio station.
Ura Redneck if you think BMW's are the call letters for a radio station.
Ura Redneck if you think cow tipping should be an Olympic sport.
URA Redneck if you think Deliverance was a love story.
Ura Redneck if you think Dishwasher Broken means wife has no money.
Ura Redneck if you think Don Perignon is a Mafia leader.
Ura Redneck if you think Ernest is funny.
Ura Redneck if you think French onion dip is and exotic tobacco product.
URA Redneck if you think God look like Hank Williams, Jr.
URA Redneck if you think heaven looks a lot like Daytona Beach
Ura Redneck if You think Internet is a new brand of fishing equipment.
Ura Redneck if you think paprika is a third-world country.
Ura Redneck if you think potted meat and crackers are an hors d'oeuvre.
Ura Redneck if You think potted meat and saltines is an hors d'oeuvre.
Ura Redneck if you think potted meat on a saltine is a hors d'oeuvre.
Ura Redneck if you think potted meat on a saltine is an hors D'oeuvre.
Ura Redneck if you think toilet water is exactly that.
Ura Redneck if you think Volvo is a part of a woman's anatomy.
Ura Redneck if you think Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.
Ura Redneck if you think your boyfriend hits you 'because he cares'.
Ura Redneck if you use a bed sheet as a sofa cover.
Ura Redneck if you use more than one can of hair spray per week.
Ura Redneck if you use your mailbox to hold up your clothesline.
Ura Redneck if you view a a family reunion as a chance to meet women.
Ura Redneck if you view duct tape as a long-term investment.
Ura Redneck if you view the next family reunion as a chance to meet girls.
Ura Redneck if you voted for Tammy Bakker as 'Best Dressed Woman of the Year'.
Ura Redneck if you voted Tammy Bakker as Year's Best Dressed Woman.
URA Redneck if you voted Tammy Faye Bakker as Year's Best Dressed Woman.
URA Redneck if you wake up with Red Man in your hair.
URA Redneck if you walk into a restaurant with a toothpick in your mouth.
Ura Redneck if you want the national anthem to be Free Bird.
Ura Redneck if you want to be a D.J. when you grow up.
Ura Redneck if you want to be a disc jockey when you grow up.
Ura Redneck if you want to be DJ when you grow up.
Ura Redneck if you wash your car more often your kids.
Ura Redneck if you wear knee-high stocking with a skirt.
ura Redneck if You were holding a beer in your wedding picture.
Ura Redneck if You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.
Ura Redneck if you wet the bad and 4 other people immediately know it.
Ura Redneck if you wonder how gas stations keep their bathrooms clean.
Ura Redneck if you wore a three-day growth of beard before Don Johnson.
Ura Redneck if you write off a radiator as a business expense.
Ura Redneck if you're arrested for getting relief in an ice machine.
Ura Redneck if you're entertained by a 6 pack and a bug zapper.
Ura Redneck if you're family tree doesn't fork.
Ura Redneck if you're holding a beer in your wedding photo.
Ura Redneck if you're holding a beer in your wedding picture.
Ura Redneck if You're overjoyed when you wake up and the bed isn't wet.
Ura Redneck if you're still upset about 'Gunsmoke' being canceled.
Ura Redneck if You're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
Ura Redneck if you've asked a widow for her phone # at the funeral home.
Ura Redneck if you've Bar-B-Qued chitlins' on the grill.
Ura Redneck if you've been arrested for getting relief in an ice machine.
Ura Redneck if you've been arrested for relieving yourself in an ice machine.
Ura Redneck if you've been arrested for relieving yourself in an ice.
Ura Redneck if you've been too drunk to fish.
Ura Redneck if you've ever barbecued spam on the grill.
Ura Redneck if you've ever BBQ'd Spam on the grill.
URA Redneck if you've ever been blacklisted from a bowling alley
URA Redneck if You've ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
Ura Redneck if You've ever been too drunk to fish.
Ura Redneck if You've ever bought a used cap.
Ura Redneck if you've ever cleaned fish in your living room.
Ura Redneck if you've ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.
Ura Redneck if You've ever cut your grass and found a car.
Ura Redneck if you've ever done Christmas shopping at a truck stop.
Ura Redneck if You've ever given rat traps as a gift.
Ura Redneck if You've ever given rat traps as gifts.
Ura Redneck if you've ever heckled during a eulogy.
Ura Redneck if you've ever left Santa Claus a PBR and a Slim Jim.
Ura Redneck if You've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.
Ura Redneck if you've ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.
Ura Redneck if you've ever names a child for a good dog.
Ura Redneck if You've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.
Ura Redneck if you've ever rolled your riding lawn mower.
Ura Redneck if You've ever shot a deer from inside your house.
Ura Redneck if you've ever stolen a bulldozer.
Ura Redneck if You've ever stolen toilet paper.
Ura Redneck if you've ever used a weed eater indoors
Ura Redneck if you've ever vacationed in a rest area.
Ura Redneck if you've ever worn a cowboy hat to church.
Ura Redneck if You've ever worn shorts to a funeral home.
Ura Redneck if you've ever worn something to church that had sequins on it.
Ura Redneck if you've hollered, Rock the House Bubba at a recital.
Ura Redneck if you've lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.
Ura Redneck if You've never paid for a haircut.
Ura Redneck if you've spray painted your girl's name on an overpass.
Ura Redneck if you've spray-painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
Ura Redneck if you've used a weed eater indoors.
Ura Redneck if you've used lard in bed.
Ura Redneck if you've worn a tank top to a wedding.
Ura Redneck if you've worn something to church having sequins on it.
Ura Redneck if your 9x9 living room has a Spanish decor.
Ura Redneck if your all-time favorite movie is Cannonball Run.
Ura Redneck if your appearance got you fired from a construction job.
Ura Redneck if Your baby's favorite teething ring is a garden hose.
Ura Redneck if Your baby's first words are Attention K-Mart shoppers.
Ura Redneck if your belt buckle is bigger then your head.
Ura Redneck if your belt buckle is heavier than 4 lbs.
Ura Redneck if your best suit is a Budweiser cap and an orange vest.
Ura Redneck if your bother-in-law is also your uncle.
Ura Redneck if your bumper stick says My other car is a combine.
ura Redneck if your bumper sticker says My other car is a combine.
Ura Redneck if your car has never had a full tank of gas.
URA Redneck if your car wakes people up when you drive down the street.
Ura Redneck if your car's rear tires are twice as wide as the front.
Ura Redneck if your chain to your wallet is as big as your dog chain.
Ura Redneck if your checks feature pictures of dogs fighting.
Ura Redneck if your children address you as Uncle Dad.
Ura Redneck if your Christmas tree has a deer stand in it.
Ura Redneck if Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
Ura Redneck if your dad and you to are in the same grade.
Ura Redneck if your dad walks U to school b/c you're in the same grade.
URA Redneck if your dad walks you to school because he's in the same grade.
Ura Redneck if your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
Ura Redneck if your diploma includes the words Trucking Institute.
Ura Redneck if your dog and wallet are both on a chain.
Ura Redneck if your dog and your wallet are both on a chain.
Ura Redneck if your dog and your wallet are both on chains.
ura Redneck if your dog can smoke a cigarette
Ura Redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
Ura Redneck if your dog can't watch your cat without gagging.
Ura Redneck if your dog sleeps closer to you than your wife does.
Ura Redneck if your driveway is bordered by half-buried tractor tires.
Ura Redneck if your ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.
Ura Redneck if your family tree doesn't branch.
Ura redneck if your family tree doesn't fork!
Ura Redneck if your family tree doesn't have any branches...
Ura Redneck if your family tree has no branches.
Ura Redneck if your family tree is a straight line.
URA Redneck if your family tree is hollow.
Ura Redneck if your father is also your uncle.
Ura Redneck if your father is in the same grade as you.
Ura Redneck if your father made your personalized license plate.
Ura Redneck if your favorite Chinese meal comes from a can labeled LaChoy.
Ura Redneck if your favorite Chinese meal comes from LaChoy.
Ura Redneck if your first grandchild is born on your 26th birthday.
Ura Redneck if your flashlight holds more then four batteries.
Ura Redneck if your front porch collapses and kill more than 3 dogs.
Ura Redneck if your front porch collapses and kills more than 3 dogs.
URA Redneck if your front porch collapses and kills more than five dogs.
Ura Redneck if your front porch collapses, killing more than three dogs.
Ura Redneck if your front porch falls in and kills more than three dogs.
Ura Redneck if your funeral has more pickup trucks than cars.
URA Redneck if your gene pool is only a foot deep and usually empty.
Ura Redneck if your have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.
Ura Redneck if your Home Library is a Bible and the Farmers' Almanac.
Ura Redneck if your home needs a hitch.
Ura redneck if your horse mounts station wagons.
Ura Redneck if your house doesn't have curtains but your pickup truck does.
Ura Redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, and your truck does.
URA Redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
URA Redneck if your house moves and your 27 cars do not.
Ura Redneck if your house warming involves removing the tires.
URA Redneck if your idea of foreplay is saying, 'In the truck, Bitch!'
Ura Redneck if your idea of going formal is a black truck.
Ura Redneck if your idea of health food is pork rinds.
Ura Redneck if your idea of safe sex is a padded headboard.
Ura Redneck if your Junior and Senior Prom had a Day care.
Ura Redneck if your Junior-Senior Prom had a Day-Care Center.
URA Redneck if your kid takes a siphon hose to Show  and  Tell.
Ura Redneck if your kids are described as dumb as a brick.
Ura Redneck if your kids have a three-day-old Kool-Aid mustache.
Ura Redneck if your KKK robes were the cleanest clothes you ever wore.
Ura Redneck if your levi's have skoal can prints on the pockets.
Ura Redneck if your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
Ura Redneck if your living room sofa is covered by a foam backed throw.
Ura Redneck if your local 'Ere! 'E says 'e's not dead!
Ura Redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.
Ura Redneck if your local funeral home has a neon sign in the window.
Ura Redneck if your mama has a spit cup on the ironing board.
ura Redneck if your mat says, 'You'd better have a search warrant.'
Ura Redneck if your matchbook doubles as a toothpick.
URA Redneck if your mother doesn't put on shoes to go grocery shopping.
Ura redneck if your mother has a spit cup by her ironing board.
Ura Redneck if your mother has ammo on her Christmas list.
Ura Redneck if your mother is your sister.
Ura Redneck if your muffler is held on by a coat hanger.
Ura Redneck if your mule backs up to every stump it sees.
Ura Redneck if your neighbors have ever asked to borrow the light bulb.
Ura Redneck if your next family reunion is a chance to meet girls.
Ura Redneck if your parrot can say. 'Open up, it's the police!'
Ura Redneck if your picture is on the wall of a McDonald's.
Ura Redneck if your pocket knife often doubles as a toothpick.
Ura Redneck if your pocket knife's been referred to as Exhibit A.
Ura Redneck if your porch collapses and kills more than seven dogs.
Ura Redneck if your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die.
URA Redneck if your porch collapses, and it kills more than 7 dogs.
Ura Redneck if your porch collapses, and it kills more than seven dogs.
Ura Redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
URA Redneck if your rear tire are twice as wide as the front ones
Ura Redneck if your rear tires are twice as wide as the front ones.
URA Redneck if your savings are just out of reach for that '76 Pinto.
Ura Redneck if your savings are out of reach for a '76 Pinto.
Ura Redneck if your school fight song was Dueling Banjos.
URA Redneck if Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater.
Ura Redneck if your tattoo says Mother and it's misspelled.
Ura Redneck if your taxidermist is on 'speed-dial'.
Ura Redneck if your tool box is bigger than your pantry.
Ura Redneck if your truck can pass over a 55 gal drum without touching it.
Ura redneck if your truck can run over a 50 gallon drum and not touch it!
Ura Redneck if your truck cost more than your house.
Ura Redneck if your Truck has curtains, but your house doesn't.
Ura Redneck if your van has curtains and your house doesn't.
Ura Redneck if your wading boots double as dress pants.
Ura Redneck if your watch band is wider than any book you've read
Ura Redneck if your wedding looks more like a family reunion.
Ura Redneck if your wife beats you at arm wrestling.
Ura Redneck if your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
Ura redneck if your wife drinks more beer than you do.
Ura Redneck if your wife ever burned out an electric razor.
Ura Redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.
Ura Redneck if your wife keep a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
Ura Redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
Ura Redneck if your wife owns a camouflage nightie.
Ura Redneck if your wife owns more deerheads than teeth.
Ura Redneck if your wife would rather fish off a bridge then shop.
Ura Redneck if your wife's best shoes have steel toes.
Ura Redneck if your wife's hairdo has been caught in a ceiling fan.
Ura Redneck if your wife's hairdo has been ruined by a ceiling fan.
Ura Redneck if your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling.
Ura Redneck if your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.
Ura Redneck if your will states all your possessions be sold at auction.
Ura Redneck if your will states that all your possessions be sold at auction.
Ura Redneck if your Xmas cards include a Xerox copy of your butt.
Ura Redneck if your yard has ever been the proposed site for a landfill.
Ura Redneck if, And the '57 Ford is on cement blocks instead of wheels.
Ura Redneck if, Anyone in your family wrestles alligators of a living.
Ura Redneck if, Anything outside the Lower 48 is 'overseas.'
Ura Redneck if, If Bill Clinton is the most intelligent man you've seen.
Ura Redneck if, If Hilary Clinton is the prettiest woman you've seen.
Ura Redneck if, More than three major appliances are on your front porch.
ura Redneck if, Motorcycle gangs are afraid of your grandmother.
Ura Redneck if, Somebody ask for your ID and you show them your belt buckle.
Ura Redneck if, The family business requires a lookout.
Ura Redneck If, the jumper cables are the most used accessory on your car.
Ura Redneck if, The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights.
Ura Redneck if, The original color of your carpet is an unsolved mystery.
Ura Redneck if, The reindeer on your lawn at Christmas are pulling a '57 ford.
Ura Redneck if, There is a stuffed possum mounted any where in your home.
Ura Redneck if, You consider dating second cousins as 'playing the field.'
Ura Redneck if, You consider Outdoor Life deep reading.
Ura Redneck if, You converted your carport into a beauty shop.
Ura Redneck if, You cut your grass and find a car.
Ura Redneck if, You don't like those 'new-fangled' people.
Ura Redneck if, You don't need a clean shirt to go to work.
Ura Redneck if, You eat 'chitlins', 'grits', or frank-and-beans frequently.
Ura Redneck if, you get too drunk to fish!
Ura Redneck if, You go to a family reunion looking for a date.
Ura Redneck if, You have a bumper sticker on your bowling ball.
Ura Redneck if, You have a Hefty bag for a passenger side window on your car.
Ura Redneck if, You have a rag for a gas cap.
Ura Redneck if, You have a tire swing in you house.
Ura Redneck if, You have an above ground pool and you fish in it.
Ura Redneck if, You have Mason jars filled with stuff the FBI can't identify.
Ura Redneck if, You have more than two brothers named Bubba and Junior.
Ura Redneck if, You have never seen a blinking light on top of a building.
Ura Redneck if, You keep a spit cup on the ironin' board.
Ura Redneck if, You know how to milk a goat.
URA Redneck if, you laugh at racist jokes.
Ura Redneck if, You mow your lawn with a tractor.
Ura Redneck if, You owe your taxidermist more than your annual income.
Ura Redneck if, You own more than two tractors.
Ura Redneck if, You paint your car with house paint.
Ura Redneck if, You refer to a long-bed pickup as a STRETCH-LIMO.
Ura Redneck if, You roll your own cigarettes.
Ura Redneck if, You share your beer with the dog.
Ura Redneck if, You smoked at your wedding.
Ura Redneck if, You smoked during your wedding.
Ura Redneck if, You still think the Eagles will get together for a final tour.
Ura Redneck if, You take a beer with you to a job interview.
Ura Redneck if, You take your friends outside to watch the rabbits breed.
Ura Redneck if, You taught your dog to retrieve beers from the fridge.
Ura Redneck if, You think 4-H stands for Horses, Hogs, Hoe-downs and Harleys.
Ura Redneck if, You think Campho-phenique is a miracle drug.
Ura Redneck if, You think Country and Western are the two kinds of Music.
Ura Redneck if, you think espresso is a courier service.
Ura Redneck if, You think French onion dip is an exotic tobacco product.
Ura Redneck if, You think people who have electricity are uppity.
Ura Redneck if, you think Slim Fast is Reba McEntire's drummer.
Ura Redneck if, You think the remote control is your kid brother.
Ura Redneck if, You think Virginia Slims is a new brand of condoms.
Ura Redneck if, You think Volvo is a part of the female anatomy.
Ura Redneck if, You thinks rabbits are food, not pets.
Ura Redneck if, You weigh four pounds more after you find your keys.
Ura Redneck if, You're dog and wallet are both on a chain.
Ura Redneck if, You've been arrested for reliving yourself in an ice box.
Ura Redneck if, you've ever asked for Beano on your Big Mac.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever been arrested on an obscene mud-flap charge.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever been to drunk to go fishing.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever lost your wife in a poker game.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever made change in the offering plate.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever named a child for a good dog.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever run down a bowling lane and slid into the pins.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever shot anyone for looking at you.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever used lard in bed.
Ura Redneck if, You've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.
Ura Redneck if, Your 'watch-dogs' are geese.
Ura Redneck if, Your boxer shorts bear the slogan of any fast food restaurant.
Ura Redneck if, Your brother-in-law is also your uncle.
Ura Redneck if, Your daddy is also your favorite uncle.
Ura Redneck if, Your doormat says, 'You'd better have a search warrant.'
Ura Redneck if, Your family tree does not fork.
Ura Redneck if, Your favorite hangout is the Phillips 66 near the freeway.
Ura Redneck if, Your favorite Olympic event is American Gladiators.
Ura Redneck if, Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.
Ura Redneck if, Your girlfriend just sold off her 'old' saddle.
Ura Redneck if, Your house doesn't have any curtains- but your truck does.
Ura Redneck if, Your idea of foreplay is: Get in the truck, Bitch!
Ura Redneck if, Your laundry can walk around without you in it.
Ura Redneck if, Your mailbox is made out of old auto parts.
URA Redneck if, your mother genuinely admires your girlfriends tattoos.
Ura Redneck if, Your mother has ever been arrested for poaching.
Ura Redneck if, Your mother keeps a spit-cup on the ironing board.
Ura Redneck if, Your sister subscribes to 'Soldier of Fortune' magazine.
Ura Redneck if, Your truck is taller than your house.
Ura Redneck if, Your two year old has more teeth than you do.
Ura Redneck if, Your wallet and your dog are both on a chain.
Ura Redneck if, Your wife has four-wheel drive on her vacuum cleaner.
Ura Redneck if, Your wife outweighs your truck.
Ura Redneck if, Your wife's brass knuckles set off the airport security.
Ura Redneck if, Your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
URA Redneck if: Birds are attracted to your beard.
URA Redneck if: Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.
URA Redneck if: Jack Daniels makes you list of most admired people.
URA Redneck if: People hear your car a long time before they see it.
URA Redneck if: the dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
URA Redneck if: The gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.
URA Redneck if: The Home Shopping operator recognizes your voice.
URA Redneck if: The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
URA Redneck if: The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.
URA Redneck if: There are more than five McDonald's bags in your car.
URA Redneck if: you bought a VCR because wrestling comes on while you're.
URA Redneck if: You burn your yard rather than mow it.
URA Redneck if: You clean your fingernails with a stick.
URA Redneck if: you consider the fifth grade you senior year.
URA Redneck if: You ever cut your grass and found a car.
URA Redneck if: You go to a stock car race and don't need a program.
URA Redneck if: you have a hefty bag where the window of your car should.
URA Redneck if: you have a house that is mobile and five cars that aint.
URA Redneck if: you have ever bar-b-qued Spam on the grill.
URA Redneck if: you have ever used lard in bed.
URA Redneck if: You have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape.
URA Redneck if: you have one last dip and you keep it for 3 days.
URA Redneck if: You have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.
URA Redneck if: You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.
URA Redneck if: you know how many bales of hay fit in your car.
URA Redneck if: you mow the front yard and find a car.
URA Redneck if: You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't.
URA Redneck if: you own more than 3 shirts with cut off sleeves.
URA Redneck if: You own more TV's than books.
URA Redneck if: You record wrestling while you're at work.
URA Redneck if: You take a fishing pole into Sea World.
URA Redneck if: You think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
URA Redneck if: You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
URA Redneck if: You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
URA Redneck if: You think a turtleneck is key ingredient for soup.
URA Redneck if: you think suspenders are a type of shirt.
URA Redneck if: You think the French Riviera is foreign car.
URA Redneck if: You think the stock market has a fence around it.
URA Redneck if: You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
URA Redneck if: You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.
URA Redneck if: You've ever financed a tattoo.
URA Redneck if: You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberately.
URA Redneck if: You've totaled every car you've ever owned.
URA Redneck if: your best suit is a Budweiser cap & an orange vest.
URA Redneck if: Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years.
URA Redneck if: Your CB antenna is a danger to low-flying planes.
URA Redneck if: Your coffee table used to be a cable spool.
URA Redneck if: Your considered an expert on worm beds.
Ura Redneck if: Your entertained by a 6-pack and a bug-zapper.
URA Redneck if: Your kids take a siphon hose to Show and Tell.
URA Redneck if: your other truck is made by John Deere.
URA Redneck if: Your wife has ever said, Come move this transmission so.
Ura redneck when you can drink tobacco spit!
Ura redneck when you can guzzle Everclear!
What do you call 32 redneck women? A full set of teeth.
What is Redneck foreplay? (Nudge) Are you awake?
What is Redneck foreplay? `Get in the truck, bitch.'
You're a Redneck if you've been too drunk to fish.
You're a Redneck if: Your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die.